The Gaurdian Ghost of Cloudland Canyon

Cloudland Canyon is one of the most beautiful places I have ever been camping.  It is quiet and filled with the gentle sound of trickling water.  It is known for its waterfalls, but the small waterfalls are just as beautiful as the bigger more famous waterfalls.  The park is situated on the Southeast corner of  Lookout Mountain, but isn't overrun with tourists like the Northeast side of the park.   A deep gorge runs through the park, which is filled with creeks, waterfalls, and lush vegetation.   On a quiet evening, camping in this park, the children can explore and discover adventure while the adults find peace around a fire.  During the day, extensive hiking trails innervate the park offering views of rare beauty.

At night, after the campfire is out and all the campers have retired to their tents to sleep,  it is said that a ghost wanders the park leaving footprints behind him.  The ghost is often seen on a high point in the park looking down on visitors.   He is seen on horseback and in the garb of a Cherokee brave.  Many campers report seeing him at their campsite and other campers have reported finding the tracks of an unshod horse in their campsite when they wake up in the morning.   He is often seen wandering between campsites, watching the campers.  These sightings are not described as fearful encounters and many believe the Native American is there to protect the park and its residents.   I never saw this ghost while we were camping in Cloudland Canyon, but I could see why he would want to stay in the park, even after death.   It is one of the most beautiful places I have ever camped.

For this bountiful semester, I thank you, baby Lord Jesus....

I think finals should be celebrated much like Thanksgiving....with praise to the dear baby Lord Jesus, many thanks, and reflection regarding the reasons you should be happy with your life. So, without further contemplation, here are my reflections upon the school semester (on the subject of lessons learned, things I am thankful for, and things I would probably do differently):

1) You are not always in control of your grade. Especially in classes that require you to demonstrate a skill and rely on another person's reactions, performance, and unforeseen obstacles....sometimes that A is just not in the cards. (Or that B....)

2) I would not hire most law students to be my lawyer....I'm not talking now. I am talking about five years down the road when we are established and certified to practice law. In five years, I would not want 90% of these people to be my lawyer. I understand waiting until the last minute for something that impacts your life, but not waiting until the last minute for a huge case that impacts another person's life. Another big reason: these people do not give a shit about anyone except themselves. Selfish lawyers and potential lawyers....do us all a favor. Jump off a bridge (or move to Cambodia and live under one).

3) I will not take another class that is not required just because it may be helpful on the bar exam. I do not do as well in these classes, I don't listen as hard as I should during the year, and I almost certainly end up having to teach myself the subject last minute. Which I would have done anyway before the bar....and certainly closer to the bar. Not making this mistake again. (Read: if you are not interested in this subject and not self-motivated enough to keep up with it through the year....it.is.not.worth.it.)

4) Sometimes, maybe you should consider planning your schedule around your final exams. Back to back final exams in difficult classes are NOT fun. They are even less fun when they are both at 8:30 in the morning. Tests on the same day=spontaneous combustion. Yeah....I need to start looking at final exam schedules.

5) I should dwell on the questions I got wrong a whole lot less. Worrying is not going to make it better. Obsessing is not going to somehow change my answer for me. Comparing notes will only serve to frustrate me. It's probably best I walk away from the exam and drink myself into oblivion, so I black out and cannot remember not only how I got in my bathtub, but even the subject I was tested on.

6) I'm thankful I go to classes. It makes it a lot easier to study when I actually decide to buckle down and do so.

7) I'm thankful I have teachers that write the books from which they teach. It makes it easier to know what they *may* want on their exams, although this is not a guarantee. If nothing else, it helps you when going through an E&E that says something different, because, HEY, in their book, they say _____________.

8) Maxine and Leonidis will never get law school finals. While this is frustrating, I'm also thankful for it, because this means they can empathize and not try to one-up me with a similar law school horror story. I'm also thankful because it means that they've not ever had to deal with the gut-wrenching terribleness of a LSF...which I (mostly) wouldn't wish upon my worst enemy.

9) Drinking is not an adequate way to deal with LSFs. I mean this. I like alcohol as much as the next gal. But I liked this one phrase that came out of the movie "How Do You Know?" (an otherwise completely useless bullshit movie that I do NOT recommend you seeing) where Reese repeats her father's mantra: "Don't drink to feel better. Drink to feel EVEN BETTER." I like this. I drink in celebration. However, I will maintain my earlier option that if you are simply drinking to forget, then that doesn't count.... ;)

10) I'm thankful for post-finals celebratory sushi. Sushi tastes even sweeter when you are eating it after endless days of micromeals, black coffee, and power bars. No really...it does.

What are YOU thankful for/reflective about/reluctant to do again?

If my life were a play....

Normally I write every single day. It's very cathartic and a great way to get rid of things that are bothering me. On the other hand, 14 hours of sleep does roughly the same thing....the only casualties of my hibernation was a missed call to my boyfriend and a half-finished "Earl the Squirrel" story I was making up for my brother. This leads me to my topic of discussion today: I've somehow neglected to name some of the main characters of my life, and I'm pretty sure calling my peoples "the boyfriend" and "my mom" will eventually get old, so I'm going to engage in a (drum roll please) SUPER AWESOME NAMING EXTRAVAGANZA.

In the interest of anonymity, I will not give official or even semi-close names for my peoples. I also will not give them names of inanimate objects (because that would just be weird). So without further adieu, here are the main characters of my life and many of my stories:

My mother (aka: sometimes will be referenced as crazy, ridiculous, or lacking in superior mentality): she is a source of a great many stories, many of them told from a frustrated point of view. She calls me at least 50 times a day (seriously.not.joking) and many times just doesn't get it. She can also be quite witty, although I find she's generally funnier when her barbs are not aimed at me. I think I shall call her Maxine, after that mean lady from the cartoons who is occasionally funny. Apparently she prefers Irma (seriously, WHO PREFERS IRMA?!?!?!) but Maxine it is.

Brother #1: he is not too much younger than me, and favors sleeping to being awake. However, when he is awake, he has a wicked sense of humor that girls generally turn and run from. It's like garlic to a vampire. He is literally the equivalent of a human sloth. I therefore shall call him Cyd. (My mom would also have you know Cyd is creepy and, if he weren't her son, she would seriously question his lack of a criminal record.)

Brother #2: he is quite a bit younger than me, and a lot like me. He's incredibly smart, but lacking in common sense to a degree that is hilarious and very endearing (note: I am neither incredibly smart or hilarious/endearing....I meant in the sense of personality). He likes playing video games to a point where he should technically be blind, but somehow he managed to escape from the terrible fate of blindness I have inexplicably been given. In light of all these facts, I think I shall call him "Calvin," after his favorite comic strip (although I'm pretty sure he prefers Hobbes).

Boyfriend: he has somehow managed to put up with me for quite some time now, and doesn't show any signs of giving up on me. He's funny, likes reciting movie scenes in the shower, and is a serious car enthusiast. I also suspect he hates my cooking (although he professes to love it), simply from the sheer amount of times he opts to go out for dinner instead of staying in. From here on out, he will be known as Leonidas, the character he probably quotes the most in the middle of his showers. (Note: this was a tough decision, because he also loves quoting the movie "Troy" and might have preferred another name. Too bad. Leonidas stands.)

I have another friend who follows my blog that I shall simply refer to her name she has already given herself: "Blog Creeper." Her biography can come at another day, although I may allow her to write her own, if she so likes.

My dad doesn't really come up a whole lot in my stories, but he's pretty damn funny too when I actually get to hang out with him. He likes fishing, working, and sleeping (though not to the extent that Cyd does). I say this because any time we go on vacation, we end up staying in the hotel more than leaving...because it's his "damn vacation too, and he deserves a break." I think I shall call him Danny, due to his very minimal resemblance to Danny Tanner from Full House. Maxine thinks this makes no sense. I don't care, Maxine. (She's pissed I gave her a shitty name and gave him a decent one. Like IRMA was any better???)

So, there are the main characters in my life, although I'm sure the secondary ones will come up from time to time, and I shall name them as they come. As for me, I'll just refer to myself in the first person rather than the third, thus taking away all need for one. However, Maxine thinks I need a name for the conversations I have with her that I sometimes illustrate in third person. She hereby has deemed me "Fidget," the bat from The Great Mouse Detective (apparently because I'm blind as a bat)...although I do NOT have a gimpy leg. (I can do a great impersonation of him though, if you ever want to hear it.) I guess Fidget is a decent enough name.

I think that about sums up the vast ridiculousness of my life....Maxine, Cyd, Calvin, Leonidus, Danny, and Blog Creeper.

And me....Fidget.

May God have mercy on our souls.

Recommending A Fellow Blogger

Frances Garrood very kindly sent me a copy of her second (I think) novel called 'The Birds, The Bees and Other Secrets'. It's really a woman's book I suppose but I don't mind admitting I read my wife's Jill Mansells and, of course, I have to research women's mags. It was an enjoyable read and should appeal to anyone who likes quirky characters. Because this is definitely a character-led story and I wanted to keep reading to find out what happens to them all. Some of the people in the story aren't even given proper names and even the various dogs that appear have their own eccentricities.

If you get a chance, please get hold of a copy of this book. I promise you won't be disappointed. You can't have mine because it has Frances' autograph in it.

Spirit Cabinets

In the late 19th century and the early 20th century that was a movement known as the spiritualist movement.  I have written about the spiritualist movement before and those of you who know the paranormal well are probably very familiar with it.  During this time their was an explosion in interest in the supernatural in general.  Mediums and explorers of the otherworldly were everywhere having seances and trying to connect with the other side.  Well known people like Sir Arthur Conan Doyle endorsed the movement.  

A spirit cabinet is one of the many tools that was designed to aid mediums and spiritualist during this time period.  The cabinet was a tool inspired by an audience member viewing a medium.  At the time, mediums put on quite show.  They summoned spirits and made objects move.  Lights flashed, ectoplasm was spewed forth in a dazzling proof that ghosts were among us.  One audience member was skeptical and indicated that mediums could be using the same slight of hand a magician uses to produce such affects.  They said the medium should be bound in a box so they couldn't use slight of hand.

The spirit cabinet was made to accomplish this.  During a seance, a medium was bound in the locked cabinet.  Once bound within the cabinet, the medium would produce an even more amazing show.  Music and light would come from the box. Sometimes ghosts hands would creep out of cracks and crevices.

Of course, in reality, the spirit cabinet made it even easier for the many fraudulent mediums of the time to fake spiritual encounters. Once locked in the box, they could easily escape their bindings and use their hands to manufacture ghostly phenomena.  All they had to do was creep back into their bindings to convince the audience that ghosts had filled the room with the paranormal rather than them.     Sometimes spirit cabinets were little more than a curtain with a chair behind it that the medium hid behind.  

The cabinets many flaws were exposed by stage magicians like Houdini who showed how easy it is to fake the ghostly phenomena from behind a curtain.   This was one of the many nails in the spiritualist coffin that proved that most mediums were frauds and that ghosts didn't move furniture or play music on demand.

There once was a girl from law school...

A girl with law exams back to back,

Was decisively starting to crack.

The moment arose--

her computer froze,

That's what she gets for using a Mac.

One of my professors wanted our class to come up with limericks for Wills, Trusts, and Estates cases. Suffice to say, I find it hard enough to read any cases, so I didn't jump on that particular bandwagon. Additionally, limericks are supposed to be entertaining and the only way you could make that class interesting would be to conduct it in a Jerry Springer format (c'mon, don't tell me the subject isn't just ripe with potential for chanting, personal comments into the "microphone," and the occasional (simulated) bitch slap). This got me to thinking: what if I were to write limericks all the time? (To answer that question: I would probably be considered far more annoying than I already am viewed and eventually be stoned by a large group of people with a mob mentality and an unquenchable taste for blood--although I suppose I wouldn't be considered as annoying/pretentious as someone who went around composing haikus all the time.)

Take the above, for example: I love my PC. I'm not quite sure what all the hullabaloo is about Macs. They don't have a right-click buttons, they need special software to be compatible to anything remotely cool out there, and they've essentially ripped off Lenix, smacked an apple logo on it, and labeled it "trendy." Sure, they may not be any worse than PCs....but they certainly aren't superior. (And you're paying mondo mucho buckeroos for that free operating system and picture of an apple.) I wouldn't wish this on anyone...but it sure would be fun to watch (refer to my post regarding my relationship with technology--I frequently am that girl...why can't I wish it on someone else for a change??)....

Or how about a limerick for how I feel right now, which cannot be described with any good adjectives like funny, witty, or even alive (okay, alive isn't an adjective, but you get my point)....

I once went two days without sleep,

after weeks of minimal upkeep.

I decided to waive

any chance of a shave,

in exchange for counting some sheep. 

I'm pretty sure that's self-explanatory. I'm exhausted. I've had about five hours of rest in the past sixty hours. I'm to a point where I get halfway through a thought and completely lose it. I can't even focus on what people are saying. I resorted to caffeine for a perk (not my cup of tea, so to speak). No more. Now, I get to relax in my wonderfully comfortable bed with brand new clean sheets and a chance to finally recharge. 

Oh yeah, and law school exams are over. Unfortunately, the cruel evidence of the harrowing two weeks remains...glaring at me (and others) like two accusing caterpillars sitting on my face. 

 To the students whose exams go on...

I hope you have shittons* of fun.

For me, I'll be snoring,

 In my bed. Have fun poring

Over books. I'm offically done... 

(Bitches)

*pronounced to rhyme with "kitten"

GOOD NIGHT!

Ikeda Tools Lawyer

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